Eau de Jo

...is really hard for me to do without talking about other people. A literary agent was talking to me once about doing my memoirs, and I kept thinking, "There is no way in hell I am going to talk about my mother." I LIKE my mother. But I can't tell my life story without occasionally making her look bad, since we have an interesting relationship. I'd just rather not.

And I never talk about doing sessions because I feel like there is a bit of a sacred trust there. I know the subs dont always feel that way, and I think some dommes have set a standard for discussing such things openly and so that is part of what their subs experience, consciously or unconsciously. For me to suddenly start talking about the details of what I do would be a major change, and I would feel weird, with one or two obvious (to me) exceptions. And I also get pretty involved with my subs and I can't take that ironic stand-back-and-laugh thing without feeling dishonest, even though I love things like Mistress Ruby Ties It Together.

But I do want to discuss this one aspect, which is that if I go long enough without doing a session, I get an anxiety you wouldn't believe. Today I did my first session since before the holidays and it is one big long "ahhhhhhhhhhh."

Plus tonight I get to do my first homebase (Irving Plaza doesn't count, since none of my friends were performing with me) performance since before the holidays at Starshine, which is one of my all-time favorite burlesque shows.

So I ought to be easier to live with for the next few days, at least to myself.